In Due Time
As the summer is coming to the close the emporium opens again after my (longer than expected absence). If you are new here welcome, if you are a regular – it is nice to see you again, please sit and enjoy the crisp air and the musky smell of fallen trees.
Today I bring you a story, personal one. A story of how me acting too swiftly and without much consideration led to me losing a game a cherished very much. It is not to be a tale of self wallowing or asking for pity, as what has happened was 100% my fault, but a tale of caution, so you may avoid the mistake I made.
Some time past I had a campaign with a few people I liked. The campaign itself was rocky, but I did everything in my power to keep it afloat, which makes the ending even worse, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. It was running for 14 sessions over 4 months, almost on a dot. Last few sessions left me feeling that the players were not enjoying it, as the atmosphere has changed, which was my first sign something was not alright. Second reason for the incident that has happened was me catching a player spending most of the session on their phone, which made me mad (more than it should have), but still I did not do anything and let the resentment brew inside of me.
The final part is what makes me the most ashamed. Before in the game, I told one of my players that if they were bothered by something they should message me and we should resolve it. One day that player came up to me with something and yet I did not see it the same way as they and told them that the best way to resolve this issue would be to talk with other players, as it was related to something interpersonal. They did not want to approach the other party and so I became bothered as in my eyes there was no maliciousness and the other party might have been not aware. Despite my earlier promise I failed to act and thus I’ve let this player down.
Having both the annoyance of the conflict and friction arising, as well as other circumstances clouding my judgment, I decided that the game does not appear to have a good future and I shamefully ended it between the sessions, citing lack of will and enthusiasm.
Later this week after some deliberation I came to the conclusion that the game could’ve still been salvaged, as I’ve done it before, and yet it was too late and I lost an overall great party and one of the best players I’ve ever had, due to my rashness and action on what I perceived was game ending issues, growing more and more regretful and ashamed of my decision, but what I’ve done could not have been taken back, as I’ve lost contact with the great player.
If you can take something from my story is that you can have a feeling/hunch, but still is is worth to spend some time investigating and talking to people, but it isn't enough to justify an irreversible decision. Even I, a GM with 11 years of experience can make such a mistake. My plea is that you please wait until you know what is actually happening and even experience and general personality don’t stop you from making mistakie you might regret later.
If I could contact this player I’d say “I’m sorry for letting you down”.
